Wheelie at 15 weeks

Dear Wheels

Today we hit 15 weeks of gestation.  25 to go, and the good stuff will hopefully arrive soon–I felt your sister for the first time around 17 weeks (very sporadically) and I’m eagerly awaiting feeling you quicken and move.  For all that I complain about pregnancy (and I complain a LOT), the movement, seeing you on ultrasound, and hearing your heartbeat are what makes it all worthwhile for me.

I got some great test results back this week.  For all that I’ve been feeling miserable–no relief from the nausea, several spectacular episodes of puking, and NO relief with the advent of the second trimester….my test results all show that everything is healthy.  The nuchal fold/quad screen which checks for things like Downs, chromosomal abnormalities and spina bifida showed me as having great odds–the odds of the average 20 year old, in fact…which we can both agree isn’t bad for a woman of 32 (and who was nervous about her “advancing age” with this pregnancy).  So for all that the wrapping paper is a bit battered (seriously-can we quit with the weight loss–not that I don’t like a lower scale number, but when it’s because I’m starving myself because of nausea and being the unwilling victim of bulemia it can’t be good for either of us)…the oven itself is in tip top shape.

I have some difficult choices to make in the next 8 weeks.  Whether I’m giving birth in the US or Singapore.  Whether I’m going to elect for us both to get antibiotics and try for a vaginal birth or opt for a C-section to minimize your exposure to potentially harmful bacteria. Early delivery to minimize risk?

At yesterday’s ultrasound we tried to sneak a peek at your sex, but you chose instead to show off your spine and moon us.  So much for finding out this week.  The “big” ultrasound is on June 20th and I would like to be clear that I WANT TO KNOW which names I’m fighting with your dad over and what clothes (if any) I get to buy.

I have a strange insistent feeling that you’re a boy.  But I had the same feeling with your sister, and look how that turned out.  So I don’t trust my instincts with regards to sex.

We recently spent some time in the US, and may I just say that you are far more trouble than your sister was on airplanes at the same gestational age.  With Ellie I was fine.  With you, I thought the BAD SMELLS from the coffee and the food served were going to do me in.  I’ve rarely been as nauseous as I was on those flights.  We have another trip home planned, and I’m partially dreading it if things don’t improve in that area.

This morning, for the first time, I laid on my stomach and felt the distinct hard ball of my uterus.  By the end of the pregnancy, if I attempt to lay on my stomach (my preferred sleeping position, fyi kid) it will feel like I’m trying to sleep on a wiggly basketball.

With each day I feel a little more confident in us.  I’m frightened of how your arrival will change things, but even as I worry about that…I feel all dreamy about holding you.  What your little face will look like.  Seeing your dad and your big sister holding you.  Your first cries.  Watching you play in your baby gym.  I am so excited that you’ll be joining our family.



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