This past Wednesday I woke up and felt fine. I took Elanor to a free “check us out” class at a Little Gym near us, and then we went to lunch at an Indian restaurant across the street. About halfway through lunch my throat began to get that post-nasal drippy scratchy shit I’m going to have a sore throat tomorrow feeling. I tried to ignore it and finish running the days errands, which included dropping off a suitcase that delicate care and love from United baggage handlers had ripped a handle from for repair (thanks Samsonite 10 year warranty!). On the drive down to the Samsonite store, I began to feel progressively worse…like maybe I shouldn’t be operating heavy machinery at high speeds with my toddler in the backseat worse. By dinner my throat felt like I was chewing on cut glass for kicks and out of nowhere my ears, which generally don’t hurt unless I have an ear infection had begun throbbing.
It is shocking to say that I had trouble eating? sleeping? That I woke up at 5am and sat around waiting for urgent care to open up? That I burst into tears when I went there at 7 and found out that they only do bloodwork from 7-9am and don’t take patients until 9? That I went home and just huddled in bed until 9?
Verdict? Raging ear infection with a throat virus added in for kicks. And two hours of sleep. Oh, and could you wear a mask and not breathe on your kid? kthanxbai!
I am supremely lucky. Not only am I lucky enough have a great partner, but we have friends and family close by. Ravi took charge and asked his parents to take Elanor as I was not making any sort of good decisions. In my sleep deprived delirium I was certain I could take care of her…I’d just draw lips on the mask or something, RIGHT? When I got home with my meds, Elanor made a beeline for me. When Ravi took her to take her to his parents she began crying. I realize that it’s just normal separation anxiety, but I felt like crap (on top of feeling like crap) and I burst into tears too. Yeah, I could have taken AWESOME care of her that day.
The other big hurdle was that Elanor had her one year well baby visit that evening (our pedi has evening hours, which is great so that we can both be at the major visits). With the viral thing, obviously I couldn’t go. I hated not being there. Our pedi had a baby not long after E’s 6 month visit, so we hadn’t seen her in a long time and there has been a lot of change in the past 6 months. I wanted to make sure that all the bases were covered, and even though I emailed Ravi a long list of stuff, I didn’t feel comfortable with not being there…this is the first doctor’s appointment of her LIFE that I have missed, and it felt horrible.
This isn’t the first time I’ve been sick since E. There have been times when due to PPD or physical illness I have asked for and received some assistance with Elanor. But this is the first time where I have been so incapacitated that I couldn’t do the things that I see as part of my role as her mom, like be at her doctor’s appointments.
Yes, she is Ravi’s kid too. Yes, it was fine. Yes, he’s a smart man who even has a degree from MIT, so you’d think he could handle something like a 1 year well baby visit and he DID. But I was so wrapped up in my not being there and the self-flagellation of getting sick on the wrong day that I couldn’t see it and was upset that he didn’t get out the puppets and re-enact the whole damn appointment for me.
Short version? Being sick and having a little kid? SUCKS.
How do you guys handle it? What’s the worst part? Any suggestions for next time?